I always imagine that the girl in this song made it because of her charming sense of humor. Just like me. I mean…that has to be the funniest joke you have ever heard.
She’s Gonna Make It
Garth Brooks Listen HERE & Purchase HERE or HERE
Written by Kent Blazy, Garth Brooks & Kim Williams
He followed her to work this morning
He’d never seen that dress before
She seemed to sail right through
Those dark clouds forming
That he knows he’s headed for
After seven years of marriage
He wanted out
Now after seven months of freedom
It’s clear that there’s no doubt
She’s gonna make it
And he never will He’s at the foot of the mountain
She’s over that hill
He’s sinkin’ at sea
And her sails are filled
She’s gonna make it
And he never will
No, it’s not like she’s forgot about him
She’s just dealing with the pain And the fact that she’s survived so well without him
You know it’s driving him insane
And the crazy thing about it
Is she’d take him back But the fool in him that walked out
Is the fool that just won’t ask
She’s gonna make it
And he never will
He’s at the foot of the mountain
She’s over that hill
He’s sinkin’ at sea
And her sails are filled
She’s gonna make it
And he never will
I went to dinner tonight and someone there got up from the other end of the table and walked over to where I was sitting to ask me what was wrong. Nothing was wrong. But then I started wondering what was wrong. And then on the way home, I felt really sad, and I wasn’t sure why. Sometimes you just have off days. The obvious solution was to text bomb one of my most wonderful friends in an attempt to decipher my deepest thoughts.
10:27 I’m having a fat night.
10:29 I wanna go to a drive-in movie.
10:30 I want to go on vacation.
10:35 I want to be beach ready but I also want to eat fried chicken right now.
10:38 I’m watching something on Lifetime with Jennifer Love Hewitt & it’s terrible.
10:46 Remember Party of Five?
10:50 I wish it was fall already. I miss oversized sweaters and scarves.
10:53 I’m trying to decide if I want to get out of bed to get some cheese and crackers.
10:55 Do you miss me?
11:22 Riggins is on Leno.
[if you care about Riggins, duh, of course you do: part 1 & part 2]
And if you were wondering what all this means and why I’m bothering with this terrible blog post, I’m also testing all of you out there to see if you’re good listeners. Because this could very well be the most mundane thing I have ever written. My theory is that I’m really dull on the days I feel fat because I’m consumed with thoughts of fried chicken…maybe? Are you so glad that I’m including interviews this year? Can you imagine how it would be if that wasn’t a factor? Are you ready for this to be over already?
That was going to be the end of the worst post ever. Until this part where I tell you that I just searched YouTube for “Cheese & Crackers Barbara Mandrell.” Do I love cheese so much that I’m just ad libbing the lyrics of songs to include it? I’m having an off month. Someone send help.
Crackers
Barbara Mandrell Purchase HERE
Written Kye Fleming & Dennis Morgan
Hello baby
I’m sorry I said the things I did
It was a silly fight
I was wrong, you were right
What I really mean to say is
You can eat crackers in my bed anytime, baby
You can kick off all the covers in the middle of the night
You can sleep with the window open wide
Do anything as long as your by my side
You can eat crackers in my bed anytime
I should be happy
No dishes to wash now but my own
No clothes to pick up
A double bed to myself now that your gone
Oh, but it’s lonely
I’m sorry I ever let you go.
It’s a matter of fact, I’ve got to have you back
I just want you to know
You can eat crackers in my bed anytime, baby
You can kick off all the covers in the middle of the night
You can sleep with the window open wide
Do anything as long as your by my side
You can eat crackers in my bed anytime
You can sleep with the window open wide
Do anything as long as your by my side
You can eat crackers in my bed anytime
Yeah, you can eat crackers in my bed anytime, baby
You can kick off all the covers in the middle of the night
You can sleep with the window open wide
Do anything as long as your by my side
You can eat crackers in my bed anytime
And this song is SO BRILLIANT. Especially because of the use of “used to.” We need more of that.
Love Me Like You Used To
Tanya Tucker Purchase HERE
Written by Paul Davis & Bobby Emmons
In a cozy little restaurant for lovers
It seems so out of place for you and me
We used to play around under the covers
But now it’s just a place to watch TV
So love me like you used to
When our love was brand new
And darlin’, when we’re through
You can love me again
And hold me like you want to
Instead of like you have to
Love me like you used to love me
When you used to love me
Baby, we could use a long vacation
But the trouble here is bound to tag along
We used to be each other’s inspiration
When it only took my touch to turn you on
So love me like you used to
When our love was brand new
And darlin’, when we’re through
You can love me again
And hold me like you want to
Instead of like you have to
Love me like you used to love me
When you used to love me
Well, we used to sit and talk about forever
But now we hardly ever talk at all
We walked a lot of tightropes together
We always caught each other when we’d fall
So love me like you used to
When our love was brand new
And darlin’, when we’re through
You can love me again
And hold me like you want to
Instead of like you have to
Love me like you used to love me
When you used to love me
1. Generally look bored. Yawn. Flip the menu over eight times and roll your eyes as if there are no choices. (This works especially well at places like The Cheesecake Factory, where there are endless choices.) Wonder out loud if you should leave early.
2. Carry a giant purse. You’ll lose the mystery that you’re high maintenance, because this is after all the loudest warning bell – but also, did anyone really think you weren’t? no. – but you will have the added mystery of what the hell does she keep in there? And if, god forbid, anyone asks what you keep in there, say “eight lip glosses, three pairs of sunglasses, diamonds, and the body of the last person who asked me that.” And don’t elaborate any further.
3. Constantly check your phone. In fact, I like to be on my phone when I present myself at a venue, especially if I’m worried that I’ll be the first one there. (Which has only happened maybe three times in my life ever.) But keep checking your phone throughout the duration of your public outing. If you get really bored, go to the bathroom and take pictures of yourself, then send to all of your friends so that the outfit you meticulously put together is not wasted.
Like this.
4. If eating or drinking, order something on the menu but ask to change it so much that the end result is nothing like what the standard offering is. For example, if you order a grilled chicken salad, ask them to hold the chicken, add fried goat cheese, put the dressing on the side, and sans the croutons. Then when your server asks if you “just want the house salad?”, say “no, I’m really into the grilled chicken lettuce mix, and the house salad is too small.” Then when your amended salad arrives, make sure to let everyone know that it is “way too big.” It is also helpful to ask what the waiter or bartender suggests, then completely ignore their suggestions. And always ad lib as much as possible. Don’t just order a chai latte in a paper cup like some soccer-playing t-shirt-wearing “real” girl would. Order an eight pump soy chai latte – extra hot but don’t over scald the soy milk and yes, with water – in a real mug, and then sit down and give everyone the once-over. If you’re feeling particularly standoffish, ask the bartender what the house vodka is, then immediately act repulsed. Or don’t ask, then when he asks if house vodka is suitable, act offended.
5. Dress like a celebrity going to the airport (read: stacks and layers). Great style should look effortless, but it never actually is. A friend asked me just the other evening how many bracelets I was wearing: 21, not counting my watch or the three hair ties around my wrist. (Three, because different pony tails and top knots require different hardware.) And always remember that your most important accessory is a bottle of Fiji or Smart Water.
Baggage Claim
Miranda Lambert Purchase HERE
Written by Natalie Hemby, Luke Laird & Miranda Lambert
I have been draggin’ around your sensitive ego
Making sure that your bags arrive on time
For the dog and pony show
A little suitcase like a brick
It kinda makes it hard to get a good grip
I drop your troubles off at the conveyor belt
I hand you a ticket to go get it yourself
At the baggage claim
You got a lot of luggage in your name
When you hit the ground, check the lost and found
‘Cause it ain’t my problem now
I can’t carry it on
I got a lot of troubles of my own
It’s all over the yard, in the trunk of the car
I’m packin’ it in
So come and get it
If it ain’t obvious what has set me off today Behind every woman scorned is a man who made her that way
Go on take your little buisness trip
With that sweet little habit that you just can’t kick Ya better call your mama when ya get to town
‘Cause I ain’t gonna be hangin’ around
At the baggage claim
You got a lot of luggage in your name
When you hit the ground, check the lost and found
‘Cause it ain’t my problem now
I can’t carry it on
I got a lot of troubles of my own
It’s all over the yard, in the trunk of the car
And I’m packin’ it in
So come and get it
Come and get it
Come and pick it up, pick it up
Before I blow it up and flames
Ya better pick it up, pick it up
Baby, I’m leaving everything
At the baggage claim
You got a lot of luggage in your name
And when you hit the ground, check the lost and found
‘Cause it ain’t my problem now
I can’t carry it on
I got a lot of troubles of my own
It’s all over the yard, in the trunk of the car
Well, I’m packin’ it in
So come and get it
Come get your shit
Saturday night radio is the best. I heard TWO ’90′s songs right in a row. Which made me think of this great ’90′s song, and then I discovered that it isn’t a ’90′s song at all. Whoopsie daisy. Blame my ’90′s childhood.
If you can truthfully say That you’ve been true just one day
Well, that makes one in a row
One in a row, one in a row
And if you can look into my eyes
One time without telling lies
Well, that makes one in a row
One in a row, one in a row
Why do I keep lovin’ you
After all the things you do
And just one time
Come into my arms
And be glad that you’re in my arms
Well, that makes one in a row
One in a row, one in a row
Why do I keep lovin’ you
After all the things you do
And just one time
Come into my arms
And be glad that you’re in my arms
Well, that makes one in a row
One in a row, one in a row
I have issues balancing creativity and order, and I have many friends who do too. I’m sure I lean on it as an excuse far too often, but it’s hard to focus on answering emails and checking off a to-do list when you’d rather be writing or listening or schmoozing. To me, Chris DuBois is the epitome of creative businessman. I honestly cannot fathom how he does it – because he is so talented creatively, yet he is a brilliant businessman. And in his spare time away from songwriting, publishing, executive producing, being really witty and funny, etc., he is father to his eighteen kids. It’s quite impressive, really. I wish I had just one-tenth of his creative genius or business sense or general knowledge of how to be successful at so many endeavors.
Set us up. We’re at your bar of choice, drinking what? Cold beer.
1. First country song that comes to mind. GO. The one I wrote today.
2. What’s your first country music memory? Having to share a bedroom with my sister so that my dad could put a studio in what should have been my bedroom.
3. What song always makes you cry? “Deeez Nuuuts” by Dr. Dre
4. What is your favorite instrument in a song? What is your favorite instrumental solo? Steel guitar…steel guitar solo.
5. What is the best part of the music business? What’s the worst? Best: the process of writing a song. Worst: the process of trying to get a song cut.
6. If I wasn’t a songwriter/publisher, I would be a… Poverty stricken father of 5.
7. Who is your favorite songwriter? Bob Mcdill.
8. What record could you not live without? Brad Paisley’s next album.
9. If you could have written any song, what would it be? Taylor Swift’s next single.
10. Quickfire:
ballad or tempo: ballad
night or day: day
vinyl or iTunes: iTunes
beer or wine: beer
boots or barefoot: boots
sand or snow: sand
acoustic or electric: acoustic
golf or rodeo: golf
cowboys or truckers: cowboys
whiskey or women: pass
Beatles or Rolling Stones: Beatles
Ford or Chevy: Chevy
fried chicken or steak: steak
Wranglers or tux: tux
…
Your Man
Josh Turner Purchase HERE
Written by Chris DuBois, Jace Everett & Chris Stapleton
Baby lock the door and turn the lights down low
Put some music on that’s soft and slow
Baby we ain’t got no place to go
I hope you understand
I’ve been thinking ’bout this all day long
Never felt a feeling that was quite this strong I can’t believe how much it turns me on
Just to be your man
There’s no hurry
Don’t you worry
We can take our time
Come a little closer
Let’s go over
What I had in mind
Baby lock the door and turn the lights down low
Put some music on that’s soft and slow
Baby we ain’t got no place to go
I hope you understand
I’ve been thinking ’bout this all day long
Never felt a feeling that was quite this strong
I can’t believe how much it turns me on
Just to be your man
Ain’t nobody ever loved nobody
The way that I love you
We’re alone now
You don’t how
Long I’ve wanted to
Lock the door and turn the lights down low
Put some music on that’s soft and slow
Baby we ain’t got no place to go
I hope you understand
I’ve been thinking bout this all day long
Never felt a feeling that was quite this strong
I can’t believe how much it turns me on
Just to be your man
I Can’t believe how much it turns me on
Just to be your man
that's me & Vince Gill...Best Friends Forever (click photo to enlarge)
I bet you thought this sketch was worthless. But guess what? It brought in $40 for tornado relief! (And some random guy that I didn’t even know bid $35. What?! I love good people.) Chris auctioned it off and drove up the price when he called it “folk art”. I guess my work will probably absolutely be highly in demand now. This is the first time 365 days of country music has ever participated in a benefit, and I’m just so happy that this raised more than it cost to frame it. Especially since that guy doesn’t really look like Vince Gill. (It’s really hard to draw wispy hair.) (Actually, it’s just really hard to draw people.)
I’m so very honored to call such a great guy my brother. He put these shows together and raised a chunk of money for East Kentucky tornado victims. THANK YOU to Chris Stapleton, Morgane Hayes Stapleton, all of their friends who sang a song or two, The Station Inn, everyone who came out to the shows, and to the people who bought auction items! We are called to do the best with what God gave us. What a beautiful way to use your gifts, errrybody!
What You Give Away
Vince Gill Purchase HERE
Written by Al Anderson & Vince Gill
You read the business page
See how you did today
Life’s just passing by
You live up on the hill
You’ve got a view that kills
Never wonder why
After you’ve counted everything you saved
Do you ever hit your knees and pray
You know there’s gonna be a judgment day
So what will you say
No matter what you make
All that you can take
Is what you give away
What you give away
There’s people on the street
Ain’t got enough to eat
You just shake your head The measure of a man
Is one who lends a hand
That’s what my father said
After you’ve counted everything you saved
Do you ever hit your knees and pray
You know there’s gonna be a judgment day
So what will you say
No matter what you make
All that you can take
Is what you give away
It’s what you give away
After you’ve counted everything you saved
Do you ever hit your knees and pray
You know there’s gonna be a judgment day
So what will you say
No matter what you make
All that you can take
Is what you give away
You know it’s not too late
It’s all for Heaven’s sake
What you give away
What you give away
What you give away
Diamonds Make Babies
Dierks Bentley {featuring Chris Stapleton & Morgane Hayes } Purchase HERE
Written by Jim Beavers, Lee Thomas Miller & Chris Stapleton
Yeah man, that sure is one big ol’ rock
It takes up half of that velvet box
I know you’ve given this a lot of thought
You’re gonna get a yes for sure
That thing is more than just a simple stone It’s got some crazy powers all it’s own
Something will happen when she slips it on
They never tell ya at the jewelry store
Yeah, diamonds make babies
And babies make mamas
And mamas make daddies make changes they don’t always wanna
I know that you love her
She’s one special lady
But I’m warning you, brother
Yeah, diamonds make babies
You’ll talk about it on the honeymoon
You’ll both agree that it’s way too soon Next thing you know she’s seein’ pink and blue
Everywhere she goes
‘Cause diamonds make babies
And babies make mamas
And mamas make daddies make changes they don’t always wanna
I know that you love her
She’s one special lady
But I’m warning you, brother
Yeah, diamonds make babies
Yeah, diamonds make babies
And babies make mamas
And mamas make daddies make changes they don’t always wanna
I know that you love her
She’s one special lady
But I’m warning you brother
Yep, diamonds make babies
I know this sounds crazy
But diamonds make babies
I was upstairs in my sister’s house today when I heard her singing this downstairs. And I was just like WHY YES, I’M GONNA GO DOWNSTAIRS.
Usually about once a week, one of us says to the other “why am I singing that song? Were you just singing that?” We share a brain. And we like to finish each other’s sentences. And songs. You gotta watch out for the sister types. We have our own languages and such.
We also feel the same way about Ty Herndon. Which is we LOVE Ty Herndon. Except that I really want to have his babies because they would be so talented, and she’s already got that worked out with her hubs.
And by the way, I really love his wall lean about 25 seconds into that video. I love a good country-music-video-caress-the-wall lean. Because when you’re forlorn, you always lean against a wall. Duh.
Oh, and one more thing…when he says “oh my god, what did I do”, do you think like I do? Like…”it’s okay, she’s totally gonna forgive you when she hears you sing this?” I love the way he says “oh my god”.
Okay. I think I covered it all. Love you Ty!
What Mattered Most
Ty Herndon Purchase HERE
Written by Gary Burr & Vince Melamed
I thought I knew the girl so well
If she was sad, I couldn’t tell
I missed the point, I missed the signs
So if she’s gone, the fault is mine
I know, I know a whole lot of little things
And even though I could list them one by one
She would still be gone
Her eyes are blue, her hair is long
In ’64, she was born in Baton Rouge
Her favorite song is In My Life I memorized her every move
I knew her books, her car, her clothes
But I paid no attention to what mattered most
I never asked, she never said
And when she cried, I turned my head She dreamed her dreams behind closed doors
That made them easy to ignore
And I know, I know I missed the forest for the trees
And all I have to show, oh, when she walked out the door
The cold facts and nothing more
Her eyes are blue, her hair is long
In ’64 she was born in Baton Rouge
Her favorite song is In My Life
I memorized her every move
I knew her books, her car, her cloths
But I paid no attention to what mattered most
Her eyes are blue, her hair is long
In ’64 she was born in Baton Rouge
Her father’s tall, her mother’s gone
She moved out west when she was two The way she laughed, the way she loved
Oh my God, what did I do
I was in a honky tonk on Broadway a couple weeks ago when the house band played this song. And I was leaning over to tell my friend what the song means and how much I love it when this drunk old guy kept leaning over and interrupting me to tell me what it was about. At one point, he said “girls, there’s a lesson in this, you need to listen.” Finally, I had to just stop him.
“It’s a Merle Haggard song. And it’s about cheating! I know what it’s about. Trust me.”
Geez, some people…
…do not read my blog.
But anyways, you do, and this is a totes brill cheatin’ song that you will simply adore. Shoot, girl! Watch out Carolyn!
Carolyn
Merle Haggard Purchase HERE
Written by Tommy Collins
Carolyn, let me tell you what I heard about a man today
He didn’t come home from work, and he went away
‘Til he came to a city, bright in the night time like day
There they say he met with some women dressed in yellow and scarlet
Their warm lips like a honeycomb, dripped with honey
And somethin’ about the smell of strange perfume
Made him feel warm, and not alone
Yes, Carolyn, a man will do that, sometimes on his own
And sometimes, when he’s lonely
I believe a man might do that, sometimes out of spite
But Carolyn, a man will do that always
When he’s treated bad at home
Yes, Carolyn, a man will do that, sometimes on his own
And sometimes, when he’s lonely
And I believe a man might do that, sometimes out of spite
But Carolyn, a man will do that always
When he’s treated bad at home
}